Monday, July 09, 2007

Pardon my French

"We asked artists not to swear but sometimes they got carried away," said that most difficult to imagine personality, a "BBC spokesperson" about the complaints that followed Live Earth. Pull the other fucking one. When people swear on TV it's almost always deliberate. With rock stars this is even more the case. They swear because they think it will transform the not very interesting thing they're saying into something memorable. They swear because they think it brings them closer to the street. And finally they do it because it usually gets them a cheer.


  1. Anonymous1:46 pm

    And sometimes they swear in a misguided attempt to distract from the utter banality of their statements. c.f Madonna - 'If you want to save the Earth let me see you jump up and down. C'mon motherfuckers!' Still, the Earth appears to still be here so I guess the bouncing motherfuckers did the trick.

  2. The Bouncing Motherfuckers! Now there's a novelty acrobatic act for the Nougties!

    At least we didn't have a Janet Jacksonesque 'wardrobe malfunction', although I'd have loved to have seen Derek Smalls' smalls.

  3. Anonymous10:20 am

    If people are going to swear (which as we all know, is both big and clever), then at least consult that profanity roadie that Armando Ianucci uses on The Thick Of It. Get some creativity into your invective, you flatliner no-marks.

    "That sucked so much cock, the bell end was wearing your appendix as a little hat."

    That's some proper sweary nuggets.

  4. Very true David,

    Why or why at concerts to the crowd seem to cheer like all their birthdays have come at once when their idolised performer utters a swear word.

  5. Anonymous8:22 pm

    I don't mind cheering at swearing so much; what I loathe is cheering at obvious but right-on statements. 'Racism is, like, really bad' the singer of the Bouncing Motherfuckers might declare, and everyone will whoop and cheer. Well, yes it is. Did you think there was anything controvertial about that? Or that we might need to be reminded? If I didn't yell my agreement does that mean that I am somehow in favour of racism? Just shut and play your songs... Ooh good! Their playing the Bouncing Motherfuckers Have Come to Save the Earth! I like this one.

  6. I find it even more insulting to have to listen the bloody Pussy Cat Whores being interviewed. Please, who thought of interviewing them. They are like they look. They did loads of research before the show, like watching An Inconvenient Truth TWICE! And what about them calling Arnold the 'Mayor' of California! He he he.

  7. I watched precisely 10 seconds of Live Earth during a break in the tennis. It consisted of Chris Rock, at about 5pm, using the n-word.
    Ross ignored it and Ricky Gervaise let out a very British "steady-on" type of whoop.

    So I watched more tennis. The planet is in no danger of being saved by these people.

    ...oh, and my favourie "Thick of It" line was "You don't leak. Well, not from the mouth, anyway." Swearing isn't everything...

  8. Anonymous7:29 pm

    Opps - sorry DAivid, I hadn't seen your latest column in Word when I wrote the 'does that make me in favour of racism?' post above. Not that I'm claiming credit for an original thought, I just didn't want it to look as if I was plagiarising you in your own blog.